I am absolutely fuming! Baby Friday has uttered what will be deemed to be his first word! I should be over the moon with enjoyment but I’m not. For that word is Mum!?! Or mamamum to be precise. It’s not really in any context yet but how dare he? Here I am slaving away over a hot nappy on a daily basis, washing, cleaning, de-snotifying and displaying the highest levels of teething tolerance known to humanity, and the little s**t’s first word is Mum! My snide response is, oh well, absence makes the heart grow fonder!! but that would be a bit unfair to hardworking Mummy. It isn’t her fault that after hours and days of me trying pound the words Dad and Daddy into his head, he obviously had an adverse reaction to the pressure heaped upon him to perform and blurted anything out to try and appease! A moment of madness one might say. Others, however, might use this as proof that people (babies) will say anything when being tortured. Perhaps his cuddly toys will be charged with being complicit?
All this does not bode well for when we start trying to get him to translate the complete works of Plato from Latin, into French, then into mandarin, before his second birthday. Perhaps a stint in boarding nursery would do him good!? Regimented discipline! Teach him how to deal with the different stresses life throws at him. Teach him to be independent. It could also possibly teach him a few and far more important words other than mum! Like Dad, obviously, and give (me), mine (everything), hello (aren’t I cute?) and please (you will give it to me!) Failing that, we could always try a stint in the armed forces. That’s shocking I hear you say! It’s Character building is my response! I know they are trying to outlaw and stop the practice of using children as soldiers in some developing, war torn countries, and I totally agree, it’s the training I think would do him good. Thinking about it and all joking aside, it is actually a blessing that Mum is his first and as yet only word. Who will he call out for in the middle of the night?
Now repeat after me boy............DAD!!
So it’s the start of 2012 and almost the completion of baby Fridays first year. We have decided to put him in nursery one day a week for what they call a “school” day. For those unaware, school day refers to his times of attendance, which are 9am to 3.30pm. The reasons for this are mainly developmental, as we believe it is good for him to interact with other children and get used to other environments. Also in attending nursery he will carry out activities that he just wouldn’t do at home, such as playing with sand, glove puppet shows and so on. Yes, these are activities that could be done in the home by me but REALLY? That is a very easy thing to say, but to do? It may seem like I’m trying hard to find reasons to justify his attendance at nursery, and you’re correct, I am. This is because of the previous generation to us, grandparents that is, voicing their opinions of he’s too young and poor little thing. Blaming any cough or snivel on nursery rather than the time of year is also a favourite thought to be aired by them. I have to admit though I do not like leaving him there. As I walk away from the room I subtly peer over my shoulder to make sure he isn’t staring back with those big blue pleading eyes saying where are you going? Please don’t leave me here? He hasn’t so far, in fact he hasn’t even given me a second glance. This is due partly to the excellent facilities and staff at his nursery, and partly because I believe he is an Alpha baby! A dominant force in the dynamic of his group! A natural leader amongst babies! When I return to pick him up, he doesn’t even acknowledge me. He is way too busy dealing with the trials and tribulations of his group, or posse, as he likes to refer to them. The only time he has been upset is when one of his crew tagged the wrong area of the nursery and potentially started a turf war with the toddler’s room. Luckily with the respect that baby Friday commands amongst his peers, he managed to avert any such conflict from starting. I wonder if I should send him off to the Middle East for the summer? He could work wonders there!?!
"that's very good, now let's try some hand painting!?"